Priorities - #25
“Create a ladder of values and priorities in your life, reminding yourself of what really matters to you.” – Robert Greene
We often think of priorities as a descending list. One gets all of our focus until it’s satisfied, then we move on to the next. I don’t think that’s the right way to view them.
A better question is: How does each priority serve and support the others?
Before we go any farther. Here are my top four priorities:
God / Faith
Katie
Family
Mae / Rourke Jr.
Extended family
Work
At first glance, it may seem like work sits at the bottom and therefore matters the least. That’s not how I see it. Work may be fourth on the list, but it still carries importance, because of how it allows me to serve everything above it.
That’s the key: priority is not about neglecting what’s lower on the list. It’s about ensuring each part of your life is aligned with what matters most.
Let the Highest Priority Drive the Rest
So how should you think about the hierarchy of your priorities?
Not as isolated buckets, and not as a linear checklist.
The goal is not to “complete” Priority 1 before moving to Priority 2.
The goal is for each priority to support the others, while staying anchored to the highest one.
In practice, I try to give 100% effort to each area. Not because I can do everything perfectly, but because I want to show up fully wherever I am.
Where the hierarchy matters is when there is conflict. If a lower priority begins pulling me away from a higher one, I need to make a choice. The higher priority often wins, but careful to not just focus on the short-term.
That doesn’t mean there won’t be tradeoffs. For example, there are times when work requires me to miss family time for a short-term deadline. On paper, that may look like I’m choosing work over family. If the long-term purpose of that work is to provide, protect, and create opportunities for my family, then the short-term sacrifice may still be aligned with the higher priority.
The key is honesty.
Are you making the sacrifice for the right reason? Or are you just using “work” as an excuse to avoid what matters more?
Alignment
This is where most people get lost.
It’s not enough to simply have priorities. You have to audit whether your daily life actually reflects them.
If faith is your top priority – how does each day focus on that priority and where does it show up first?
If your marriage matters most – does your energy show up there when it matters?
If family is a core value, are you building your life around them, or fitting them into the leftovers?
Priorities are easy to write down. They’re much harder to live out and ensure the each support the rest.
Alignment is when your time, attention, energy, and decisions match what you say matters most.
Misalignment is expensive, and the longer it goes unchecked, the harder it is to course correct.
Final Thought
Priorities matter.
But what matters even more is how those priorities are connected.
You won’t always be able to give every area of your life equal time, but you should be able to draw a straight line between what you’re doing today and what matters most to you.
When something in your life stops serving the greater whole, course correct quickly.
In the end, priorities aren’t just what you say matters. They’re what your life proves matters.
Additional Resources
Book: Essentialism by Greg McKeown
Stoic Quote of the Month: “First say to yourself what you would be; and then do what you have to do.” — Epictetus
Clarity comes first. Execution follows.